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work work work [Oct. 23rd, 2012|03:20 pm]
Why do I always have to say something to my boss at work the day before I have 2 days off.  Now I'm just going to be paranoid all god damn day and night thinking about the repercussions of my words.  Someone's going to get fired...  I'm going to make more enemies...  I asked for a position that I'm not even sure if I want now.  Sure I would get paid a salary and I would be able to afford things like my own apartment, maybe a new car, and anything else that I might want or need.  I just don't know if this is all going to be worth it.  

It's time for me to just shuuuuuut the fuuuuck up again.  I always seem to do this, and I don't know why I can't step back and think before I act and speak.  Maybe it's the lack of sleep or a poor diet...  Maybe I'm just fucking crazy.  That seems more logical hahahah.  
I'm still attracted to my ex, I am so paranoid I can't stop thinking about work even though I don't have to be back there until 5:00 Friday morning.  I'm starting to think that I've lost my ability to keep my cool, and just relax.  Sometimes I'm pretty sure that my level of enjoyment is directly related to how much I've consumed.